You know, for the longest time, I had this fear that everyone was watching my every move. That if I stepped outside my comfort zone—whether it was running, working out, or, hell, even line dancing—people would judge me. Whisper about me. Think, Wow, she looks ridiculous.
So I held back. I hesitated. I stayed small.
But last night? Last night, I realized something that was both freeing and hilarious: nobody cares. Nobody gave a rat’s bahoonie (yes, ass) what I was doing, how I was doing it, or whether I was any good at it. And honestly? Neither did I.
I was doing it for me. Not to fit in. Not to meet someone. Not to impress anyone. Just because I showed up for myself.
And that feeling? That was freeing.
I spent the entire night focusing on what I was doing, what other people’s feet were doing, what my feet were trying to do. And I didn’t care if I messed up. I didn’t care if I looked out of place. I was too busy having fun. And it was addicting.
For years, I wasted so much energy trying to fit into some mold I thought the world expected me to fit into. I shaped myself based on what I thought other people wanted, toned myself down, smoothed out my edges, tried to be the version of myself I thought would be the most acceptable.
And you know what? That was exhausting. And boring.
Because the truth is, I’m not someone who blends in. I’m vibrant. I’m charismatic. I’m me. And the thought of spending one more second shrinking myself down for the sake of “fitting in” is laughable at this point.
For the last few years, I’ve been unlearning all of that. Choosing to just be me—loud, awkward, passionate, determined me. Now, if I were more emotionally secure, this journey probably would’ve gone a whole lot smoother. But, as I keep saying, I’m a work in progress.
And that’s the thing—I am only going to get better.
And here’s another truth: If people do care—if they judge, mock, or try to shimmy you down to something smaller, more manageable, less you—they aren’t your people. Find new people. Find the ones who lift you up, who encourage you, who celebrate you exactly as you are. Find the ones who don’t make you question whether you’re too much or not enough. Those are your people. Stick with them.
So if you’ve been holding back, worrying about what people will think, let me be the one to tell you: nobody cares—or at least, the ones who matter don’t. And that’s the most freeing thing in the world.
Do the thing. Take the step. Dance terribly. Run awkwardly. Lift the weights. Wear the outfit. Try, fail, try again. Because at the end of the day, the only person who really has to live with your choices is you.
And you deserve to show up for yourself.
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